what if, after talking with her for hours in my mind, the tongue won't stutter a word what if, after spending a whole day with her thoughts, the ink gets freezed what if, after having a bundle of her photos, the eyelids insist on staying up will she understand this expression of words....... I hope she does... I hope she does because I can't find the right way to start.... I don't see a reason to describe her, I don't see a reason to show the torment we've been through, Neither do I feel the need to praise her.. Shining & beautiful, her eyes, but that wasn't the thing I'd searched Sharp & strong, her mentality, but that won't pull me out of my misery Independent & avoiding, her behaviours, but that won't attract me.. These all are great, for the eyes and the brain.. but underneath all this, there's something captivating me, inner me, my heart From the storm of insecurity, to the pain of distance, from the poison of jealousy, to the ache of anxiety, there's been a friend, a healer, a parent... who listened and cared, who had loved and nurtured who freed me from my lot... And all those efforts from, from the same source... that source, with those shining eyes, that sharp brain with deep affection and teasing words, with the made-up anger and hidden care with the strong boundaries, and unbounded attention... For this time I've got to spend with her, I've been ever grateful.. One doesn't know how life will lead us, neither there's any confirmation of permanence, nor any sign of disturbance... And in this absurd boat of searching permanence, In this vast stream of roughly flowing life, I'm willing to raft by your side, till the boat sinks, or the river ends....